The original characters are the property of E.L. James.  I’m just having a lil’ fun.  No copyright infringement intended.

Chapter 7 | Foolish Pride

STEELE

I got home Friday, kicked off my shoes and settled in, I was too tired to even eat.  Some of the other editors went out for a few drinks after work.  They asked if I wanted to join them, but I declined.  I did not think it was a good idea, plus Christian would not have liked the idea anyway, anything could happen.

Since when do you give a fuck what Grey would or wouldn’t like?  Thought you said, or was it Kate?  I can’t remember; your idiotic viewpoints are so much alike.  Anyway, thought Grey was trying to run your life.  He was being overbearing and dictatorial.  Or did you forget that?

I know what you are trying to do and it will not work.  There were instances where Christian was right, but there were instances where he was wrong as well and you know it.  Do not try to put this off on me.  I stood up for myself that is all.

If that helps you sleep at night then fine, I, for one, know it doesn’t so tell it to someone who’ll listen.

Look, we have argued about this for months now.

NO YOU LOOK!  He all but got rid of your security, wiped his hands of SIP AND moved to the opposite end of the Earth and you STILL have a funky-ass attitude.  He’s going to meet someone else you know that don’t you?  He’s single and hot and alone.  And for the record, I’ve discussed and you’ve ignored me for four months, two weeks and…what time is it…18 hours.

Christian loves me he would never cheat on me.

CHEAT ON YOU?  Who the fuck has to cheat?  You told him to fuck off because he wanted to share his life with you.  The man is not destitute, he won’t behave as if he is and he shouldn’t be expected to. 

I went to school for four years.  Got good grades and secured a job in my chosen field…

Yes, yes, you also met, fell in love with and received love from Christian Grey.  No small feat all things considered.  Then you managed to throw all of that out of the window because of some foolish pride.

I just shake my head.  You do not understand.

No YOU don’t understand and it’s going to bite you in the ass one day.


 

Saturday was difficult.  I have been second and third guessing my personal life for months now.  Just as I managed to rationalize my decision to postpone Christian and my wedding, something happens, a song plays or an article comes out causing me to wonder if I am wrong.  After my conversation with Elliott, I spent time watching Christian over the Internet, looking at the various pictures of him and reading the articles that released.  Things here in Seattle calmed down but wherever Christian is, there is a following.

I did not give much thought to the picture of him at what looked like a business dinner.  He was seated between to young Taiwanese women, but they were seated beside two men who could have easily been their husbands or boyfriends.

Uh, huh.

The next picture was just taken out of context.  I mean, yeah Christian is a Dom, but I cannot fathom him letting the world see him that way and I know he does not like to share so there was no way he would be involved with the two women in the sexy ass picture of him in only a towel.

Uh, huh.

The press has its spin on words and photographers can sway your opinion based on their camera angle.  I mean, look at the stories that went on around here.  None of what they said was true and as far as the pictures go, look at the one of me walking back to work looking like a lost lamb or something.

So the women surrounding him at the Beitou Hot-Spring Area were just a fucking coincidence, the woman drinking and laughing with him at Barcode was imaginary and what about the woman he was with in front of Taipei 101 and what about…

ENOUGH!  They were pictures, nothing more.

Sunday was the icing on the cake.  I was trying to relax and get back into work mode.  I sat down to finish my notes on the last manuscript I read when I hear Brownstone’s Foolish Pride; I forgot I had this on my playlist:

Don’t let foolish pride get in the way of a good love
Like yours and mine

How could you let me walk outside your door
When there’s so much you wanted to say?
How could you just pretend you could ignore
All the feelings that true love has made, ooh baby?

Ooh baby, ah baby, I was right there by your side
Through good and bad, ooh baby
Ooh baby, ah baby, let me know the reason why
You’re treating me so bad
Don’t let foolish pride get in the way of a good love
Like yours and mine
Don’t let foolish pride make you say things
That you don’t mean

Ooh my baby, my sweet baby
I’m the one you held so dear
Now that the weather here is changing
You don’t even want me near
You know in the beginning, everything was rosy
Everything was a okay
Now you’re telling me to go
I guess I’ll be on my way

Ooh baby, ah baby, I was right there by your side
Through good and bad, ooh baby
Ooh baby, ah baby, let me know the reason why
You’re treating me so bad

Don’t let foolish pride get in the way of a good love
Like yours and mine
Don’t let foolish pride make you say things
That you don’t mean

I hit the skip button on the iPod remote but end up hearing Come Back to Me by David Cook:

You say you gotta go and find yourself
You say that you’re becoming someone else
Don’t recognize the face in the mirror looking back at you

You say you’re leaving as you look away
I know there’s really nothing left to say
Just know I’m here whenever you need me I’ll wait for you

So I’ll let you go, I’ll set you free
And when you’ve seen what you need to see
When you find you, come back to me
Take your time, I won’t go anywhere
Picture you with the wind in your hair
I’ll keep your things right where you left them
I’ll be here for you

Oh and I’ll let you go, I’ll set your free
And when you’ve seen what you need to see
When you find you, come back to me

DAMMIT!  I need to talk with Christian.  We can work this out I know we can.  It is just a matter of knowing our limits.  We are each going to cross some line somewhere.  I have to tell him I was wrong.  I have to tell him I need him here or ask him to let me come there.  I need him.  He said all I had to do was let him know when I was ready.

What about your precious job?  You’re a new editor.  Aren’t you afraid of loosing your position, the respect of your colleagues, your boss?  I thought you wanted the world to take you seriously.  I thought public opinion was more important than your personal life.

Fuck all of that.  I need Christian.

Just as I am coming to terms with mea culpa, I hear the apartment door slam open then shut and Kate barges into my room in tears mumbling incoherently, “Kate you are going to have to slow down.  I cannot understand you.”

“That good for nothing bastard ruined my life…hope he catches VD…good you got rid of that fucker…nothing but a piece of shit on legs…” she keeps this up for what seems like ages.  As I listen to Kate ramble on, I search my mind for clues as to where she was and what has happened.

Lets see, this can’t be too difficult to figure out.  She’s dressed for more than pizza and a night watching movies at home.  What’s today, oh yes, it’s Sunday that means dinner at Grey Manor.  The only person she would have all of these invectives for is Christian.  Am I close?

“I do not see how he got GEH where it is.  He has no sense of human decency what so fucking ever.”  I know she is your friend, but I’m really not in the mood her and her incessant shit.  I’ll talk with you some other time.

“Kate slow down.  Who are you talking about?  Get rid of whom?”

“Oh my God Steele, get rid of Grey!  What the fuck is wrong with you?  Christian the overbearing, self-centered, maniacal tyrant Grey that’s who.”

WHO THE FUCK IS SHE CALLING AN OVERBEARING, SELF-CENTERED, MANIACAL TYRANT?

“Kate, I do not understand.  What does Christian have to do with any of this and, no offense, what are you doing here anyway?  Why aren’t you at Elliott’s place.”  I need to get a handle on what she is even talking about.  I know Christian is not on this continent so there is no way she has seen him other than in the news.

“Elliott sided with that bastard brother of his and kicked me out of his place.”  What the fuck?  Sided with Christian over what?

“When did this happen?  How did this happen?  What brought all of this on?”  Now I am rambling just like her.

“Fuck me Steele, are you loosing your good sense too?”  You better check that bitch.

“Lookie here blondie, you have got about two more seconds of my time to waste before I leave you to wallow in whatever pit of pity you fell into.  I suggest you get your run-on sentences, dangling participles, subject predicate and verbs in good working order or just forget this conversation.”  I sneer.  I am in no mood for her brand of bullshit either.  I have my own existence to contemplate and I really do not need an armchair quarterback around.

Kate’s eyes go wide and she looks like she has just seen a ghost.  I am really tired of her bashing Christian.  Elliott made his stipulations clear the last time I heard her sputtering her garbage about Christian, so she cannot plead ignorance to his point of view.

Yeah BITCH.  Start explaining yourself and make it fucking interesting.

So Kate goes into a diatribe about her evening at the Grey’s and the weekly Sunday dinner.  Apparently she started making her usual shit soup with Christian and fell down the fucking rabbit hole.

That’s what the fuck she gets.  Elliott told her over and over again to stop it, but she just wouldn’t listen.  How the fuck would she feel if Elliott talked to and about Ethan that way?  And just what’s her problem with Grey?  It’s not his fault he met you and not her.  That’s what she gets for pawning off her responsibilities on someone else.  Spoiled little bitch.  She got Elliott so why the fuck is she always prodding Grey?

You know Kate is just being protective of me.

WELL WHO THE FUCK ASKED HER TO?  And for the record, you see where her protection landed you right?  She needs to shut that big-ass hole in her head and get a fucking clue.  So, now, thanks to Miss I’m Right and You’ll Withstand My Flagrant Disrespect you’re both shit out of luck.  Got to love that Kavanaugh lack of charisma huh?  Well it is what it is.

What is that supposed to mean?

Karma is a BITCH, that’s what!

I manage to get Kate settled down and in bed. Elliott told her he would have her belongings sent here sometime tomorrow so she will call off from work to wait for the delivery.  I offered to stay with her but she insisted I go on to work.

Oh, I see.  You can take time off to help Miss Sad Sack, but not to stay in bed with the man who thinks you walk on water; or least he used to?  Let me repeat myself, “…What about your precious job?  You’re a new editor, aren’t you afraid of loosing your position, the respect of your colleagues, your boss?  I thought you wanted the world to take you seriously…”

I swear to God if you do not leave me the fuck alone I am going to…

You are going to what, CRY?  That is all you have been doing since your stupid ass ran from Grey.  What’s it going to take to make you wake up and smell the fucking tea?

Buzz, buzz, buzz.  Who the fuck is texting me at this time of night?  The Caller ID simply displays ‘Unknown Number’.  Then, all of sudden, pictures of Christian and a petite brown-haired woman staring into each other’s eyes appear on my phone.  Then another shot comes across the little screen, the woman’s head dropped as a Submissive would to her Dom.  The final picture is of Christian alone, still staring at the spot where the woman was standing.  The geo-tags on the photos show the location as Townsville, Australia.

Are you happy now?